Alex🇨🇦

The architect of the realm. Lord Alex invented the format, ran the draft, kept the sheet, ruled on every dispute, and locked the rankings — all while campaigning himself. His first-overall Spain plundered the group stage handsomely, then won the entire Cup for everybody but him, ownership having ended at the group gate. Canada's 6–0 rout of Qatar was his loudest day; Haiti, his final pick, returned not a single point from three engagements. He finished seventh, thirty-four cents down — the truest commissioner's fee ever charged, and proof the house never wins when the house also plays. The realm exists because he built it.